Living in Cohousing: Residents’ Comments

In North America

The neighborhood was wary initially. They had developers come in trying to make a quick buck with some new development. They didn’t want more short term rental housing that would attract people who weren’t interested in contributing to the neighborhood. Or They assumed we’d come in and gentrify the area in an elite way. Slowly they began to see that we were a group of owners who wanted to be apart of the neighborhood over the long term.

Dale, Southside Park Cohousing, CA*

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Most of the time issues are raised in an informal way in committees, on our email list, on the chalk board in the common house or over the dinner table. Difficult or contentious matters are identified long before something is brought up for formal decision and, by allowing those who have strong feelings to thrash out the details in various ways, by the time something comes up for a decision there is generally a proposal that people can live with.

Rowena, Cambridge Cohousing, MA*

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Photos from Jamaica Plain (MA) Cohousing: Our First Wedding, Shadow Dancing on Halloween, Cabin Fever Day, More Cabin Fever Day!

four images of a community at playJamaica Plain Coho, Boston, MA

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One couple was moving out to another town. On the day that they were packing to leave people came over to help. Someone made lunch for everyone. Dozens of others packed boxes and filled up the moving truck. They weren’t prepared at all and received phenomenal help from the group. I’m sure it broke their hearts to leave.

Lidia, Wholelife Housing, Calgary, Canada*

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There are condos built in my area that by site design, are like cohousing. They have pedestrian orientation, a common house pathways, even the picnic tables on the grassy commons which each unit views. These places on paper would be reasonably well designed cohousing developments, in practice they are not cohousing. Why not, what is the difference? The people who live there are strangers to each other, and have little interest in changing that. To me, a key part of cohousing is: The intent is to enhance community among people who are neighbors and to create relationships among themselves that are supportive and mutually satisfying.

Rob Sandelin, Sharingwood Cohousing, WA*

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At the Festival of the Earth, or Earth Day, we recognize our responsibility to care for the Earth. We participate in earth-tending and tree-planting, gathering with song, earth dedications, and feasting. We celebrate with music and dance, including a Maypole Dance.

songaia residents around a maypole

At Thanksgiving, or the Harvest Festival, we express our gratitude for the harvest, for our family, friends & community, for our work, and for all facets of Life. We celebrate with song, poetry, and feasting. (Below, making popcorn decorations in preparation for Thanksgiving feast)

songaia children stringing popcorn for Thanksgivin

Songaia Cohousing, Bothell, WA

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In Denmark

Cohousing takes a lot of pressure off the family. The modern family is over stressed—especially emotionally. A cohousing environment balances marriage and offers some relief to the emotional burdens on the modern family. Living in community provides an inherent support system. A mother with 2 children who desires a divorce must carefully consider the dramatic lifestyle consequences. Will it be too difficult to raise the children alone? Obviously, cohousing doesn’t eliminate these problems, nor should it try to, but it does add to people’s independence. Yet even though divorce might appear easier in cohousing, the statistics show that the divorce rate for people who live in cohousing is lower than for comparable segments of the general population.

Niels Revsgaard, sociologist and member of Drejerbanken*

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* asterisk denotes excerpts taken from Cohousing—A Contemporary Approach to Housing Ourselves, 2nd edition

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